Babywearing for Pregnant Moms | Why It Matters and How to Prepare Before Birth

Ceridwen

Welcome back to the postpartum prep podcast. If you're new here, my name is Kheridan and here on the postpartum prep podcast, we talk about all things preparing for life after birth. We talk about infant feeding, sleep, navigating your new identity as a mother and your changing relationships.

We talk about all the practical stuff from newborn care to postpartum recovery and today we have a very exciting conversation about babywearing. In this episode, I'm joined by Jaclyn who is a certified babywearing consultant and this episode was honestly just so fun to record because me and Jaclyn, we were just so both so passionate about the power of babywearing and we just had a great time just sharing in our love for babywearing. Jaclyn also gives us some really practical tips and guidance on things like babywearing safety and strategies for choosing your first carrier.

I won't make you wait any longer, let's get straight into it. But if you are new here, please make sure you are subscribed so you don't miss out on any future episodes. All right, let's get to it.

Welcome back to the postpartum prep podcast. Today I'm here with Jaclyn Fiedler from Your Babywearing Bestie. Jaclyn, could you just give us a little bit of intro into who you are and what you do?

Jaclyn

Yeah, sure. Thank you so much for having me. I am very honored to be in this space and to speak to your community of new and pregnant moms.

My name is Jaclyn. I live in Los Angeles. I became a mom in 2020.

So I have that COVID baby generation, almost six year old. And I am a certified babywearing consultant. And what that means is I am here to support families in their babywearing journey.

And that just means from someone who is absolutely clueless on what babywearing is, or what a baby carrier is, or why they need it, to people who have a carrier and want support using it. It's the full spectrum, whatever you need help with to help and encourage you to hold your babies and receive the nurturing and nourishment that comes your way when you hold your babies. So yeah, I love my work, and I'm obsessed.

And yeah, just always love chatting about it.

Ceridwen

Oh, I'm so glad that we got you here today to talk to us. What kind of led you into working as a babywearing consultant?

Jaclyn

Yeah, so I really love, like our background stories, because I feel like the journey, you don't ever know where it's going when you're going through it. And it's such a struggle and so hard, but then you get to the to the juice of what you feel really lit up about. And it's like, oh, I see all the puzzle.

So for me, I, I spent a lot of time in Africa and in India when I was in my early 20s. And I just loved watching moms who would be working like very serious physical labor, and who were carrying babies on their backs and cooking the meals and taking care of whatever it was. And the juggle just felt so natural on their body.

And I had never really seen it look just like, like the baby you weren't on the mom just looked like a natural extension of her body. So I just was fascinated by it. And it kind of inspired me to get interested in birth work.

I studied with a like an elder doula midwife, birth worker, and I taught yoga for 10 years in prenatal space. And all of this was before I had my own children. And I just, I think it just led me to the path once I, once my niece was born, she kind of came into the world with kind of a troubled reality.

And she wasn't with her mom for almost the first year of her life. And so this was nine years ago, we carried her everywhere, we carried the baby who was, you know, distant from their physical mom. But we this is my niece, so my sister's daughter.

And so carrying her was kind of mind blowing being around a baby was mind blowing. And my family was like an all families in family in on taking care of this tiny little infant. So getting through that inspired me a lot.

And then having my own kids, I was like, you have to have a way to exist and have your hands and have energy. And baby wearing is one of those ways I think, is instant, pretty much when you when you your carrier. Yeah, that's sort of my journey.

Ceridwen

Wow, that's really interesting. And I love I don't know, we have a lot of obviously moms listening to this podcast. But something I always like to emphasize is these ways of connecting with your baby and bonding with your baby, like baby wearing, it doesn't have to just be with the mommy, really, these can be ways of supporting well being for anyone who's caring for babies.

And I love absolutely. Yeah, would you tell us a little bit more about how baby wearing can be really helpful for parents and any other caregivers?

Jaclyn

Yeah, I was saying, grandparents can wear babies, doulas can wear babies, dads can obviously wear babies. Other parents support anybody around the child who you feel it's totally your decision, but whoever you feel can support you by wearing the baby and bond with the baby. It's a beautiful opportunity.

I know a lot of moms think they'll be the only one and then dad starts wearing the baby and it feels so magical like the oxytocin for for especially even for a man who's going to receive it in a different way. It is I know for my husband, there were many like mind blowing experiences holding his daughters and carrying them and being able to let me rest. So there's just so much in the way of how your family can support.

Yeah, support you. Yeah, yeah. And then when you go into the the benefits, it's like, there's just endless one day about like a year ago, I sat down and I tried to write them all out like right came to my head.

And I have a list over 50 benefits to baby wearing and they're not all for baby and they're not all for the wearer. But there's like, so much for both like you both receive the benefits. And I think that's the number one that people don't really realize is that baby wearing isn't a container that you put your baby into so that they can be amused and you can go about your business.

It is a connection piece. And, and when we wear our babies, the benefit is, it's going both ways. It's, it's just energy moving between the wear between the baby.

And yeah, and so it's, I think a lot of people don't realize how it can be beneficial for you as well.

Ceridwen

Yeah. And often, I mean, personally, just like the practical aspects of it. And then also the emotional aspect of it as well.

I know you said you have 50 things on that list. But do you think you give us a few of the highlights?

Jaclyn

Yeah, absolutely. So the oxytocin is not a small thing. It is huge in your healing postpartum.

And in even how your child starts to know you oxytocin is so powerful to experience that with your baby is magical. And that is I think, one of those things like once you get your baby on and they're in the right position, and they feel really good, and you have that experience, it's hard to put words to it.

Ceridwen

I know exactly what you mean.

Jaclyn

It's so good. It's kind of like when you take a really good contact map too. And it's just like your baby's on you.

And you know that it's just the best feeling. That is so powerful. Because when we're in postpartum, and it's really hard to manage the lack of this and the resources and the sleep and all of that, being able to have that moment where you get a flood of good feeling is so important.

It is a win. And we need wins in early postpartum because we've got to have the energy to keep going. Because I think we want to just stop.

But instead, I look at babywearing as like, it's like, I don't know.

Ceridwen

It's just like agile.

Jaclyn

Yeah, exactly. Exactly. So there's that there's, there's one, I like like the really sort of odd benefits that you don't hear about as much because they're really good for the postpartum.

Yeah, I'm getting outside that is like massive. You know, being able to be out and even if it's in your own backyard, or down your street, or if you're going to a public place, it feels so good to sometimes get out of the bubble, even for a moment. And this gives you the ability to do it without lugging all the stuff without needing anyone else to help you.

It's just can be you and baby and you're in your own space, but in the world and that is so good for your mind when you're tired, getting in the sun is like number one, it feels so good. It's a conversation starter, which is really great to in postpartum because postpartum lonely, it's so lonely. And it's so hard.

And when you can go out, even if it's I mean, there's gonna be days where you don't want anyone to talk to you. And you're like, if somebody asked me how old my baby is, again, or says, Oh, whatever, handful, like, there's gonna be those days. But there's also gonna be the days where, especially if you're home alone with your child, where you are going to be starving for a little bit of communication and connection.

And so adult interaction. It's like baby rings connecting you with your baby, but it's also like bringing you into the outside world. And people will ask you, Whoa, that's such a beautiful carrier or like, Oh, I had that one or I had this one, or, and it's a conversation starter.

And, and it's a really neat piece with that.

Ceridwen

I always used to get like, I just remember so many people just going, he looks so cozy in there. But I think that's like reassurance for me as well. Like I'm doing something right.

Everyone like, you know, yeah, exactly.

Jaclyn

And you, it increases your responsiveness to your baby's cues, when you have them on your body. And you can actually feel the shift in their body when they need you. And it can be that precise.

I mean, if you're obsessed on level I am, it can get that nitty gritty and precise of like, I am communicating with my child in a way that I just understand them so deeply because they're right there. And I'm watching their breath and all of that. But again, it can be as simple as I've got my baby on the carrier, I can go make a cup of tea, and like throw together a snack.

Yeah, you know, have a moment, my child is safe, I don't have to worry about putting them somewhere. Yeah, you can keep your child contained from, for me as a COVID mom, it was like, or during COVID times, it was like, I didn't know it was so scary. The world was so scary.

I could have my child right there. And nobody was like in our bubble. Yeah, just had our own space.

I was so there's just so there's so many benefits. And yeah, I could go on forever. Obviously.

Ceridwen

I know. I love what you said about even just for me is like, anytime that my son was not on my body, like my mind was in two places. Like, I literally couldn't focus on anything other than like, well, where is he?

What is he doing? Is he okay? Like, because I think you just you are, especially when they're so young, you are just so in tune and connected.

And then when he's on my body, it's like, okay, I feel actually, now that he's on me, I feel more like one person again, because I'm not doing that trying to have my mind in two places thing. I'm like, right, my mind and baby.

Jaclyn

Your baby also doesn't, I mean, up to a point, like, they don't know that they're separate from you. So your baby is going to be screaming, crying, alerting, whatever it is to get your attention because they're it's like, they're without you is completely foreign to what they know they were in you cooking and growing and hearing you and walking with you and being with you and feeling all your sense of your emotions and your sensory system, all of it like they're right there to experience that all when they're in your body.

And then when you have this infant and this baby come forth into the world, it is I mean, this is brand new for them. It's stepping into like, a room with people you've never met, never seen in, like a building that is complete, like, I don't know how it's just like, yeah, they don't never they don't know. And they don't know that connection is separate.

So when they're on you, they calm down. It's like every part of their body system is designed to like, grow and develop with their mother or care provider close. So their digestive system is stimulated by us holding them.

They I mean, so many aspects of their development is, is meant they're meant to be carried, we are meant to be carried as a species. So yeah.

Ceridwen

And even I, I don't know if you have heard any, anything about this. I read like a research, some kind of research article once talking about how even us as moms, we have like, some evolutionary kind of developments, I guess, that point towards baby wearing being like, what we were also designed for.

Jaclyn

Absolutely. I love those pieces. I think they're so fascinating.

Like for recently, I had this experience of carrying and holding in a carrier, my neighbor's son, who's three weeks, and I had him really high on my chest. And I like was looking at a video that I had recorded. And his head was right here.

And I was like, this is this is the space where we want close enough to kiss is like baby's head right here, when they're tiny infants for a lot of reasons. But I was looking at my body. And I was like, this is like, this is like a shelf, like over my heart center for like my baby's head to rest.

Yeah. And it's like, we are so designed. Now, is that factual?

Is that scientifically proven? I don't know. But I argue for it, because I think it makes sense.

It makes sense. There is research that has been done on like, preference, the preference on which hip you hold your baby on. And there's actually more people that prefer one side.

And it's just a really interesting connection, because that side of the body is connected to the side of your brain that helps you respond to your environment and protect what's in front of you. So it's like we've naturally evolved to, to know these things, but like normal culture in our hustle and bustle, like we're not thinking this hip is boosting, you know, this part of my brain or helping baby's development by bringing his knees in a certain posture. Like we're not thinking about those things.

But I think part of what I'm so interested in, in my work is like, well, why aren't we thinking about those things? And why can't we like, think they're incredible? Like, why can't those things be, you know, just as important as what the carrier looks like, or who's, you know, there's just so much to be so amazed by.

Now, not everybody has to geek out on that level. But there was someone I was talking to recently, who said, when people know the benefits of something, they play into it more, like you receive more from it when you understand where you're heading. And I think it's really cool to know that our body is postpartum is still creating the life of this child in so many ways, and they're gonna need to be held.

Like there wasn't swings, there wasn't snooze, there wasn't gadgets and all that stuff, bouncers. Before it was just human body. So your baby naturally is going to need to be held no matter if you have the easiest non clingy, non Velcro baby, they need to be held.

And, and so the baby carriers just like giving you a little, a little hand with that a little support.

Ceridwen

Yeah, it's amazing. I think I kind of love what you touched on a little bit about why aren't we all just why is this not obvious to all of us? I think one thing that moms often get is this message, like, actually, you shouldn't hold your baby too much, because you're going to spoil them or they're going to get used to it.

I was wondering what you would say to a mom who might be getting those kinds of messages?

Jaclyn

Yeah, um, I feel for you is kind of like the first or I, I, I've experienced what you've experienced. I've thought it myself. I mean, there's so many parts of motherhood that I think it is so easy to question ourselves and to get caught up in what we think we're supposed to do or how we're supposed to do it.

And I think that is such a source of like, discomfort in motherhood, and angst in motherhood and anxiety in motherhood is just that part of us that's like, we intuitively know, but then this other really loud voice or experience in us that like, wants to do it right. We want to do it right. Like who doesn't want to feel like they're giving their child the best beginning to life.

And I think sometimes things are said, and they don't always they're not always said, with the fullest meaning, but they can be tossed around. And when you're in the vulnerability of early motherhood, and new to this all, those things are so loud, so loud, like they can be louder, the criticism voices or the what ifs or even the intrusive thoughts, like all that can be so much louder than you're doing enough, you're doing a great job, look at your baby thriving. Um, I know it's a hard day, but like you still got up like, that stuff doesn't really matter.

For some reason, when we're in the trenches, it's like we attach sometimes to, to, there's just so much fear, and we're gonna mess this up. And you cannot spoil your baby. It's just point blank, you can't spoil an infant who is designed to be close to you and designed to be held and nurtured.

And they, it's like, they need us for so much that if you're not, we're all going to do things on our own way and in our own time. And with, you know, some parents are going to hold their babies all day, some are going to need a place to put their baby down for a while, some are going to need other arms to hold their baby, but the baby's got to be held. And to say that you're coddling them, or I mean, I've heard things, your baby's not going to know how to walk because you hold them so much or the spoiling, I just, the whole spoiling thing, I don't, it, I always hear people say the cliche thing, like, a baby can't spoil, but food can.

And it's, we're, the baby's not food. And it's like, I, I, the whole thing is just kind of funny to me, because I know it feels so real. And I know we say things sometimes without such emphasis and meaning, but new moms are so vulnerable.

So if you hear things, and they're starting to, like, get at you, I would just, I mean, it's natural to feel that way, too. And you know, your child, you are learning your child at the same time. And carrying your baby is only going to offer you more independence as baby grows and offer baby more independence as they grow, because they are learning about their world from your view.

So they're not learning about the world just by being pushed in, you know, a stroller that is at a different level. Like, they're seeing how you interact with the world, how you react to challenge, how you repair after conflict. They're seeing all of that, whether they're knowing what it is or not, like, they, they're watching from that level.

And it is such a deep part of education that you can't give your child if you believe that you're spoiling them by offering comfort and closeness. So challenge it, if you hear things, and they don't feel right, challenge it, or put it aside and keep your, like, heart aflame as best that you can. And it is so hard, but like, you know your child, and you are not.

Yeah, I don't know where I'm going.

Ceridwen

But yeah, I often like to remind parents, it's like, you know, I think people do get really worried about this, like, well, if I hold them now, they're gonna be one, they're gonna want to be held, like, I've got to teach them that I'm not going to hold them, because otherwise, they're going to want to be held. But I'm like, no, when you're holding them, that doesn't teach them that they get to be held. You're just responding to their needs, because they're already asking you to be held.

If you're feeling like you're being drawn to pick them up, it's probably because they're crying for you to pick them up. Right.

Jaclyn

And like, I get this message that totally, and it's powerful, too. Because for those moments where you're like, I don't want to care. I mean, there are gonna be moments, there's moments where I'm sorry, it is so beautiful.

It is so magical. It is so sacred. It is so so much presence and all this stuff.

And we know it's so good. But there are moments where like, get off of me, I can't take it anymore. You're gonna have those moments.

Yeah. And I think it's like, knowing, where was I going with that? I'm not sure where.

Ceridwen

It's okay. I think I get what you mean. Like there are it's also a reality that sometimes you might feel like you don't want to hold your baby for a second.

Jaclyn

Yes. And the point being is that sometimes, and it's a really interesting conflict, because sometimes you you want that moment to yourself and you're feeling touched out, but nobody else is around. And that baby needs to be held.

So you can put your baby in your arms and struggle through it and try to do your other stuff and babies wiggling and not settling. Or you can get them in a position that actually helps their body calm down helps their nervous system regulate and really mesh with yours. And then it's this weirdest thing happens.

You're touched out feeling and you're I'm so overwhelmed and your fears and overthinking and intrusive thoughts and I just can't take it anymore's all of that somehow gets quieter. Like that's the that's like, the thing that happened to me that got me obsessed was like, that feeling of all that loudness just you're with I relate. And it's like, yeah, you know, you know, and, and there's ways.

So it's like, you're gonna hold them anyways. So finding a way to do it that is supportive is the whole goal.

Ceridwen

Yeah, I think it's so true. I just, it's a really nice, not nice, but like a really clear vision that you just painted and like reminding me of when my son was younger, and like, I'd be trying to do things in the kitchen holding him in one arm. And he's just crying.

And I'm like, I can't even do anything because I'm trying to hold him with one arm versus just putting him in the end, like I'm feeling so overwhelmed, right? And I'm just like, I just want you to sit down and like, stop crying and just let me do this. But it's like, I got it.

Either way, he's gonna need support. So it's like I might as well put him in the carrier. And then he's just happy.

And I can just go about my day.

Jaclyn

Yeah, exactly. And then you're hot. Yeah, exactly.

Ceridwen

And I don't have that same like overwhelmed feeling because it's not like a constant struggle to get him to calm down. Right?

Jaclyn

It's only And as they grow up, that independence doesn't stifle. If anything, they know that they can go out, experience the world, see the world receive its benefits. And like when it's overwhelming for them.

They know at least let's say till preschool, or maybe I don't know how long it'll last. I have a six year old. So that's what I know.

But they will come back to you because they will come back to you for that nourishment that they receive from the closeness. And that again, is so it's like it just keeps multiplying. Like they don't, they will have the confidence to explore the world because they know there is a place to come back to.

So another benefit.

Ceridwen

Yeah. You are their safe space. And it's like, yeah, the more they know they have that safety there to return to, the easier it is for them to go out and explore the world.

Thank you for sharing all of these benefits. And I think it I hope that we've kind of painted a picture for the pregnant moms who might be listening about why you might want to baby wear some of the benefits of baby wearing. If you if a pregnant mom is listening to this and wondering what do you think they should know about getting started with baby wearing?

Maybe are there any safety tips, any tips for comfort, anything like that?

Jaclyn

Yeah. So I always start with, well, what's your goal? And a lot of the time a can you hear me?

It sounds like I'm okay.

Ceridwen

Okay, I think the leaf blower just stopped. For anyone who's listening, we had a bit of a drama because I had a leaf blower outside my apartment and I think it just stopped and I feel like maybe the sound just went like… woosh.

Jaclyn

Okay, so brand new, brand new. You're pregnant, let's say, you're getting closer to baby arriving and you're seeing lots of advertisements on social media or baby list type of programs or things and you're seeing baby carriers come by. At this time in our, I would say, here I'm in the US, it isn't the first thing on a lot of people's list to buy a carrier, but it becomes one of the most used items if you find a really good match for you and you're comfortable and your baby's comfortable.

So I would say before you just knee-jerk add them to your registry, I would take a minute to kind of try to understand or envision what you want out of it. So what I mean by that is, there are so many different ways that we all experience postpartum. So some of us will be doing a 40-day ritual at home in bed, some will be observing the five, five, five, five days in bed, five days around bed, or I can't remember the whole thing at the moment, but there's so many different traditions and I think that category of postpartum where maybe that individual has a doula or has a partner or has a mother or someone else, an auntie who is really supporting them as well so that they're able to really rest back and experience the bonding with their baby, that's like one individual experience of postpartum and that is really different than a mother who is having her baby and has to go back to work in six weeks and wants to get as much time and experience and memories with their newborn. So they want to take them to, I don't know, wherever to visit all their family.

They want to go see some, you know, sightsee some places and have their baby in pictures or they're out and sort of adventuring in the world with their child. That's a very different postpartum experience. There's women who have the complete unexpected that happens, you know, a traumatic birth experience, it's just not feeling like I thought it would, a birth that didn't go the way it was, you know, intended or wanted or desired and that postpartum experience is going to be very different than one of these other kind of archetypes of postpartum, postpartum if you will.

So there's all these different ways to experience it. There's people who are rebuilding right away. Like I want to be active with my baby.

It's not really about adventuring and sightseeing and taking the pictures. It's more about like I'm going to be walking, like I want to walk as fast as, you know, as soon as I can. I want to get whatever and that's fine.

That's great. Like my experience was really different from all of those and that's fine. Like I don't, you know, I don't think we have to attack bounce back culture so much as we do.

I think if that's the reality that you want, that's your choice, that's your life, that's your baby, let's do it safely. Let's find you a carrier that's going to match that experience so that you really can get what you want because what you really want is the experience of, you know, this is, it's okay to be a mom and to still like go after what I want and that like do that however that looks. I mean one of the benefits I have to say because it's coming up right now that is never spoken about but is so powerful and was life-changing for me was how I viewed my body when I started baby wearing was very different than my experience of not really understanding how my body works postpartum.

When you have your child and you see that your body is that shelf for their head by your heart center or is that nourishment or is that closeness, it is like so healing for how we view our bodies. So if we're one of those more bounce back moms who's baby wearing, she might actually find like a nice healthy flow with it where it's not just about achieving the look but it's more about like the connection is making me okay with my body and I can do what I need and want with my body and feel like I'm still a mom and I'm still in connection because a lot of people want to have that space but can't physically have space away from their child. So yeah there's so many different postpartum experiences and I think that's why just going and clicking on whatever carrier you see that is super popular or that is coming up for you algorithmically or whatever doesn't necessarily mean it's one that is meant to fit how you are going to experience postpartum and I think the best thing to do is to have a choice, pick a choice because you know you want something that's cozy and soft because you are around your house only for those first few months or you know you're going to be out walking and getting out and exploring things and you want something that feels quick and easy and supportive.

So I think it's just having picking a choice that is appropriate for your baby's age size development so a newborn carrier that is designed for newborns and then having a pivot plan if that's not how it looks when postpartum comes if it's the unexpected and you need an easy win and you chose a ring sling and you can't figure out how to get the ring sling on be willing to be like I'm not just going to get another ring sling and try it again because maybe it's the fabric or maybe it's this and that like try a whole new style of carrier sometimes can be really supportive as well to just being able to pivot with how life experience is and I think that's motherhood is that you can plan as much as you can for postpartum but it's going to look completely different than you envision so being willing to have something that's appropriate for those first few months and then as baby gets bigger and you're like oh I could use something else or I'm more curious and I know what I'm looking for now then you can kind of venture out and get more of the like maybe one that you're saving up for more and with safety it just comes down to a few quick things and I just it's so easy and so possible to baby wear safely that we get stuck in kind of our mind of over complicating it if you know what you're looking for you can achieve a very safe baby carrier fit easily and it's um I mean I have it down to like five things that I offer as a free guide um it's there are so many different acronyms that you can use but really what it takes is you have to feel what safety feels like in your body with your baby you can't watch me on instagram or watch a tutorial or look at the manual that's kind of confusing and like know from that what a safe carry feels like so to me it's about I really love having a checklist that I give people because it offers them the ability to like look at it try things and be like okay that's feeling this way this is what a safe fit feels like um now I can create the muscle memory and when I'm out and about and it's life is real and not like sitting in the perfect moment to get your baby in you'll know how to fix and adjust because you have the feeling of it already um that's awesome yeah yeah that's such a different perspective than I've

Ceridwen

heard before but actually makes so much sense to me because you know when you're out and about in daily life you're not going to be running through that acronym in your mind 24-7 like are they still here are they still here are they still xyz but you are going to be able to feel oh they feel like they've shifted down or they feel like yeah that's that's and you do and if you're I think the

Jaclyn

biggest thing the biggest thing for brand new parents who are interested in getting a baby carrier is that there are people like myself and there are plenty of others who want to help you and will support you and it is up to you to be like just help me and the second you say the word help me I'm rushing in to help you because to carry your baby should feel good it should feel comfortable you should feel confident it shouldn't be oh my gosh my baby gonna suffocate because I don't I don't know like how to do it or or I'm just gonna live with this it's like really hurting me back but I'm just like the baby's there it's okay she's asleep so what does it matter or she looks this way so I'll copy her and do it or all of that like that's not clarity when you put your car seat in your car and you're driving your baby around and you know the risk of what can happen if you were to get in an accident and if your car seat wasn't buckled in or if they're the straps weren't on them like you or you know sometimes when you put it on like maybe a little quicker and lazier because like let's be real there are those times or they get an arm out whatever things happen like we take that seriously most of the time when we're putting our child into into that kind of device and while baby wearing and your baby carrier isn't something that you put your child into and then look away it is something that requires the same level of vigilance and understanding and and like then it becomes second nature like I know you have a two-year-old it's like at two years old you can put your child in the car and you're not like worried did I get the height right of the buckle or this or that or are they like breathing or is their neck like you're more confident with it so so just valuing wearing your baby safely and that's why like I I just it's so funny it's like why I'm like why am I on Instagram creating content about baby wearing and like why am I trying to make it attractive and fun and enjoyable because it should be because if we put value into carrying our babies safely then like the sky's the limit then like you can get whatever carrier you want to look that's beautiful and cute and matches your outfits and whatever but you know how to do it right and and and you're it's like it's a people's medicine you should know how to carry your baby and unfortunately a lot of us don't and so value learning a couple quick little things and um and you can wear your baby safely.

Ceridwen

So you have a free a free checklist to help with learning these things?

Jaclyn

Yeah okay yeah I have I have a little list that's just um it's one page long I made it one page long so that you could print it out throw it in your diaper bag have it with you as you're learning your carrier it works for every kind of carrier so if it's a soft structured carrier a ring sling a stretch wrap a woven wrap whatever you're using to carry your baby there's just about five with a few language around some of them steps and once you get those steps you can't unsee it it's like people always tell me all the time they'll follow my content and then they'll be like I saw someone who was wearing their baby unsafely and it's like you just your brain it it becomes

Ceridwen

second nature so um we were just watching a show last night and I was like I said to my husband I was like that's not safe baby wearing but I know you do like I is it you have some um on your instagram account like showing baby wearing companies themselves that are actually not showing safe baby wearing and yeah it yeah it can be really nice when you're pregnant you actually might be being influenced by these unsafe baby wearing techniques because nobody is telling you that they're unsafe unless you know to look for it yeah and safety is such a

Jaclyn

small aspect of the baby wearing experience and I think I want to glorify that because while I do want to alert attention to certain things that are super easy fixes you see them everywhere and they're they're the smallest part of what I really care about as far as the mother baby bond but it is like the most important part to achieve that so I'm not sure if I said that correctly of

Ceridwen

how I intend I know what you mean yeah you have to know how to do it safely in order to even be

Jaclyn

able to do it yeah I mean you can do it unsafely but you're going to be distracted you're not going to be receiving as much of the oxytocin benefits because you're probably going to be carrying your baby's head in your hand because they're too low and they don't they're not resting in the place where um where it's intended by our body design as we talked you know and to hold their airway safely and to hold their spine with structure and support where we have them on our body affects all of that so if we have the understanding of a few quick things like the height of baby on your body whether their chin is dropped to their chest or if their chin is you know away from their chest and they're breathing freely because this is kinking and airway this is like the most common one is we put their chin tucked or back or to the side and this is airway cartilage for a newborn that doesn't have um they don't have the neck strength to be

Ceridwen

like that hurts let me right you know put my head down how about um kind of their head turned to the side like this yeah head to the side for anyone who is listening we also are going to be sharing this on youtube so right now we're kind of talking about some uh like we're doing some

Jaclyn

bone movements but the baby because that is ideal is to have the head to the side but okay tilted overextended in any direction so okay having your baby like this is a doll so i can manipulate it and it's not weird i'm using it as a real baby education yes but like this is first of all this is a lot of people are wearing their babies super low they think this is close enough to kiss because i can still kiss my baby's head but this is soft tissue right by their little airways their nose their mouth and it's very easy for a child to a baby who has no idea they're separate from you to just come into you and be in that you know in that area that creates risk versus a baby that is on your chest and head to the side is is super natural actually because now i can give my baby the ability to see what's going on here they're gonna practice slowly how to move their head always with a newborn i'm always surprised how like they're so floppy but they also make these really tight moves yeah sometimes so having having the care you're having here i can also come in and like shift my baby's head to the other side if they're i wouldn't turn their neck but if they if they you know if they kind of worried about flat head or um any issue this is just such an ideal place our body to carry our baby um we just don't want to see the chin tucked because your baby's airway is very sensitive so you know close close enough to kiss is high up keeping their chin off their chest there are some comfort measures that you can do as well that also support safety and um and it's simple and again once you see it you kind of get it and then you're like oh my baby's are my um my baby's actually more comfortable when i wear safely and that's what always surprises people they're like oh it's not just about like the chin tucked or like the knees being the legs being you know um dingling like when you move your baby into that position where they're ideally meant to be and sit like you are supporting their spine in a way that makes them pretty much feel weightless on your body with a good carrier so if you're not receiving comfort if you're feeling unsure if you're feeling like you're this isn't a confident thing then um i hope that we can kind of like celebrate baby wearing like we do lactation or like we do um you know work with postpartum doulas or um whatever whoever else you're taking your baby in the first few months of their life or having into your space um baby wearing consultants that's what we're there to do as well just to help you understand how to hold um your baby to receive like all those benefits amazing oh thank you so much is there anything

Ceridwen

else that you wanted to touch on before we end this episode today yeah um definitely get in touch

Jaclyn

if you're um unsure of you know how to hold your baby or what carrier to get or any of that i um in the new year i'm gonna have a resource available to new families that is going to actually we talked about some of those like postpartum um experiences and i have kind of honed in on those a little bit more and i have a resource that's going to um show you those as more like a blueprint and then in whatever experience you're um having you can go ahead and see like what carriers are going to um support that experience best and it's going to come down to like style of carrier and also brand recommendations so um really quick and easy and supportive resources and um just make this fun and enjoyable um this experience of holding your baby and um um yeah like oh amazing yeah

Ceridwen

that would be so helpful for a lot of families i'm sure i feel like when you were kind of talking about these different like archetypes of postpartum it reminded me of how how as i'm a lactation counselor and how i talk about pumps like to pregnant families because it's kind of like which pump should i buy and it's really like well it really depends on like what you're using it for and i think when i used to think about um uh baby wearing or baby carriers you know it's a bit about the aesthetic it's about what's trendy and actually you know i live in the caribbean heat maybe there could have been a better option for me than like this really like a a wrap that my son was actually sweating which actually is signs of overheating which is actually not very safe for a baby um where but that was just kind of what was trendy at the time um and it's actually maybe there was something that could have been a bit more practical for me but i just i had no idea so i think this would be a really helpful resource yeah yeah i think

Jaclyn

people don't realize how much is out there like they're just seeing what is trending or what is has the most like influencers pushing and um some of those carries are great and some of them um aren't gonna feel as great for you and your experience so finding someone like most places have someone who does what i do and you can actually come into their space and try on different carriers or you can hire someone like myself to like stand in front of a camera and try them on for you and tell you the differences so there's so many ways like it's not um uh again a lot of us are just here for the heart of what we do and we want to help you so it's like no excuses let's make this comfy let's make this exciting for you and if your baby is overheating or your back is hurting or whatever scenario it is be willing to talk it up with someone and find another another way to help you carry your baby that you're inevitably gonna need to carry anyway so find a way to do it that feels good and right for you i think it's so sad to you know i hear

Ceridwen

sometimes like oh well my baby just doesn't seem to like it or i just don't find it comfortable but then they're kind of left without any other options for you know those moments like we talked about when it would really just be helpful if you could wear baby in a carrier but maybe actually if we could give some support around exactly in the same way like you said like how we would do with lactation or sleep if we can give some more support for baby wearing and really recognize that baby wearing deserves to be put on the same kind of pedestal i guess

Jaclyn

um yeah if you um if your baby hates baby wearing if your baby hates the baby carrier if that's what you believe there's so many things to try first to just see if that's truth and if it's true that your baby really doesn't like being in the carrier and we've troubleshoot and tried again super easy things like are you hitting baby's rooting reflex are they bopping their head and arching their back because they want a nurse because you're where they're on your body is there a strap hitting that rooting reflex is um is one of their legs more uncomfortable than the other is the weight distribution hurting your back so you're compensating and then they're it there's so many reasons why are you just in the wrong carrier that you don't know how to adjust and doesn't fit your body there's so many reasons why your baby probably hates the carrier um and we can often flip that on its head and have a baby that absolutely loves to be carried and a mom that is healthy and vibrant because she's getting that support with something that she's already

Ceridwen

got to do all day long it's worth it to be able to baby wear yeah to have that support and if if anyone is looking for support from you where can they find you

Jaclyn

yeah they can find me i'm um pretty active on my instagram i try to post like daily or every other day a tip or something baby related baby wearing related um and i love to do it and i find it so fun to make that space positive and um encouraging so they can find me and i love you yeah yeah same with you and um yeah so my instagram is at your dot baby wearing dot bestie and um yeah it's a really sweet place that is growing and um just an awesome uh space i hope for people to learn and explore and not be shy and um feel secure holding their baby

Ceridwen

amazing oh well thank you so much for talking to us today i feel like we've covered you know everything from the benefits of baby wearing to some tips for how to do it more safely and we're going to be recording and a q a episode after this one so it might already be out by now if you're listening a little bit after this episode has been released so be sure to go and check out that q a episode next and we will see you in there bye for now what a fun episode i'm so glad we got to have Jaclyn come on and share with us i think you can tell we're both just so passionate about baby wearing if you have any other baby wearing questions feel free to send me a dm on instagram at mother baby well-being and i can gather up all your questions for a future episode or i can point you in the right direction make sure to also check out Jaclyn because she is such a wealth of amazing information i love following her on instagram because she always does such fun and creative baby wearing posts and also really practical tips i am constantly learning more from her strategies that i can use with my own clients and their babies if you also enjoyed this episode please would you leave a review and make sure that you're subscribed it all helps the podcast to grow and it helps me to continue making these episodes if you are new here be sure to check out all our other episodes because we have lots of really useful helpful practical tips for preparing for life after birth i'll also link in the description you can find my free postpartum checklist which walks you step by step through everything you need to do to prepare for your baby's arrival and to just set yourself up for a smoother transition to life after birth preparing for your postpartum recovery building your support network supporting your mental health all the good stuff is in that checklist so be sure to check it out thank you so much for being here today and i will see you in the next episode